just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
