he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Randomize
