No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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