I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
