My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
