Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
i think im in europe. pls send help
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
