its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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