On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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