Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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