You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
