Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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