....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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