But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
