my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
