i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
