He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
