Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
