All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Randomize
