let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize