belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
