Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I look better un-naked...
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
My liver just had a heart attack.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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