i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
