Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize
