After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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