Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
