Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
She tied me up with her honor cords...
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
