i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Even my vagina gasped.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
