ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Randomize
