their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
