The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
