the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
You took a bar mat shot.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
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