no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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