I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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