I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
wow bdsm is so cute
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
