reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I want her autograph on my taint
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize