nut hugger
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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