physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
