For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
