we have pet lesbian snakes
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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