didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
