im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
