Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
