dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Send help, water and tortillas.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
