dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
