Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i think i have two assholes
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
