i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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