I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Houston, we have a blender
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
