Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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