so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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