Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
